Getting Better All the Time 3.18

V-mars latest cliff hanger

well...I'm behind on blogging my reviews of V-Mars
But I think I have caught up on viewing of the v-mars
(notice how I am putting snow days to good academic use)

So, if you don't know who has been committing the rapes on campus, don't read anymore.

Spoiler alert.

...so, the Dean has been murdered.

the suspects
1) Eli...because he's a minority with a record.
2) His wife, because she's banging the criminology prof.
3) The criminology prof, because he's banging the Dean's wife.
4) The scary girl from Lilith house, because the Dean let the frats back on campus.
5) The people the Dean owes gambling money too.
6) The wife's ex-husband, because he got coerced into giving up a kidney.
7) Veronica, because the Sheriff hates her.
8) the Dean committed suicide (also known as Selbstmord...or "self murder" in German.)

We don't know about the confrontation between the Dean, his wife, and her lover. It looked like the Dean took a loaded gun there, knocked on the door and said, "can I come in?" So maybe he killed them. And then suicide. Which would be simple, reasonable & predictable. So I don't think so.

Veronica? Well, unpredictable from an audience perspective. Little motive, and her alibi of fending off an attacker is pro'lly solid. But the sheriff does hate her.

Eli? Yes, he will get blamed. He will spend time in jail; he'll lose his job for being a suspect, or for when the new Dean doesn't like him. Too bad, he's trying to turn his life around. And sheriff hates him.

Scary girl. She hates him/has motive. But pro'lly has alibi of taking home drunk girls. I'm betting the sheriff doesn't really like her.

Dean has gambling debts for betting on the fights? Another Red herring.

Wife. Not sensible, and she seems like a very sensible woman. Well, sensible enough to ditch a loser, marry someone financially secure, have a discrete affair (and she would have gotten away with it too if it hadn't been for that meddling Veronica Mars!)....

The Prof...well, I'm sure he's popular enough to keep his job even if the Dean hates him.

Wife's ex-husband...red herring. I think he feels paid off, he gave kidney, no more alimony.

So...that leaves us the person I think killed the dean....(And if I'm right, I may have to quit watching the show.)

The TA for the Criminology prof killed the Dean.
Why? He hates the Criminology prof and is wanting to frame him.
The TA had a perfect alibi...he went to a frat party, lots of witnesses, to confront his girlfriend that was cheating on him with Dick. (And evidently he had been tracking how many frat boys she had been cheating on with.)
TA has practice of "perfect murder" that's part of the Professors teaching plans.
TA had Veronica come in to see him to correct a few errors in V's paper...but was late...so she got time to look at TA suspect board (which V thinks is for rape suspects), and the cheating girlfriend showed up just in time for V to meet the cheating girlfriend.
The TA knew that the prof was banging the Dean's wife...and set it up so that Veronica would find out about it.
Perfect murder, have some one else be the suspect and take the rap.
TA had nothing against the dean, so the local sherrif will think no motive.

double the worry?

Hey sportsfans...it looks like my better half and I will have to play man-to-man defense.

All signs point towards twins. So says the doctor who was doing the ultra-sound.

We thank God.
Please continue to keep us in your thoughts and prayers.

:-)

forever nervous

So, I hear that once you are pregnant, you are nervous for the rest of your life. Nervous about the pregnancy, nervous about the delivery, nervous about being good parents, nervous about how society will treat your treasured child, nervous about how you've prepared the child to deal with society, nervous about what type of people they will hang-out with, nervous about them joining the Democratic party (just kidding, kinda), nervous about if the current account ratio of national debt to GDP will be fortuitious for their retirements, nervous about their lives...

I really hope and pray that I can be nervous forever. So, Dear God, if you happen to be reading this blog, first, thanks for taking the time from your busy day. Second, we really would like a healthy baby or two. We promise to try our very best to be good parents, deserving of the gift of a child. We promise to try and learn from our mistakes.

Well Sportsfans, as you may remember, all signs point to the love of my life being with child.
Or "pregers".

Anywho...tomorrow afternoon we go in for our first ultra-sound.

I'm nervous.

Please remember us in your thoughts and prayers.
thank you

write cook

oh, my...
remember when I was typing about BBQ

well finally I found the article, very nicely written, makes me wanna quit writing, so I can spend more time perfecting the BBQ

It is one of the better pieces of writing I've read recently. Because it makes me want to do something. That and the whole Pavlovian response of an artist speaking of his craft. Wow.

drool

A friend at work got me to read part of one of Mr Bourdain's books, I was reluctant, but she had a section highlighted because it reminded her of me. You see, sportsfans, back when I was young, and dumb, I needed money for food. And, well, if you can get money for cooking....it was a good idea at the time.

HEY KIDS! STAY IN SCHOOL!!! DON'T BE A FOOL!!

I never went to cooking school and worked my way up through the ranks. Because I was
a) a good dishwasher
b) always* showed up
c) was sober.

In the passage, Mr Bourdain talks about his respect for those that work their way up throught the ranks. They may not know what a ____ is, but they can make it, and they make it the way you want. They aren't just doing tours of kitchens to build their resumes, and will flake out on you, they are loyal.

Yesterday, while helping some friends fry a turkey, I thought, I am so glad I am out of food service. It was miserable, and didn't pay well. But I met alot of great people. I learned a few things about food, physics & myself. But I really don't like to cook anymore.

Unless I'm reading about BBQ.

drool

*alright, alright...not always...in my 10+years I called in "sick"

once when I stayed up too late drinking w/ a work buddy
once when I went to see Steve Cramm at the Goodwill games
once because I had a fight with my girlfriend the night before

BUT I always** felt guilty about it. And every day, for the next two years after I skipped, I would think "you could call in sick today"...

**alright, I didn't feel guilty from the night I stayed up late drinking and my drinking buddy went on to work all hung over at 7am, and I called in "sick" at noon.

I learned: Don't call in sick, because the temptation to do it again is just annoying.

what I do for fun

last night I was up until 1 am writing an essay for a professor.
Don't worry, it wasn't a required essay. It was just for fun, stemming from a discussion in class. Yes, this is telling, I had plenty of homework, NaNoWriMo, chores...and I went of on a wild tangent. Educational as it was, it was not required. The only benefit was from me learning stuff. I thought I was cool & smart & stuff...

Anyway, I'm curious, how can I make it better?

The professor's response is in the below. Sources in extended entry
____________________________________________________

Why do humans have so little hair?
The other day in class our instructor brought up the idea that humans may have lost most of their body hair due to female choice. I asked, “Historically speaking, how much choice did females have?” From the class reaction, for a moment a felt a bit like Larry Summers, (who infamously suggested that it might be innate ability or innate preference that leads to more men than women in science).
Our professor quickly pointed out that in many bird species it is the female that chooses the showy male bird. I countered with elk, and the big bull gets the harem. We quickly agreed to limit the discussion of female choice to primates.
The professor said that it seems to be in primates, the more closely the males and females are in size the less likely it is for the male to have a harem. Judson agrees, pointing out that “In monogamous species, males and females tend to be roughly the same size…human males tend to be only slightly bigger than females, and there is considerable overlap, with some women bigger than some men” (Judson, pg. 162). Next our professor, and also Judson, pointed out the correlation between relative testicle size and monogamy, “

Next, consider physical differences between human males and other male apes. As you know, testicle size is usually associated with the risk of sperm competition. Males that are at low risk of sperm competition - either because they are good at defending their harem or because they are paired with a faithful female - generally have testicles that are small in relation to their body size. Males that are at high risk of sperm competition-either because they pursue a strategy of seducing the partners of other males or because most females mate promiscuously-generally have enormous testicles in relation to their body size… [gorillas having small testes, while chimpanzees having large testes]…human males have medium-sized testicles, suggesting a low to moderate risk of sperm competition. This fact, plus the relatively small size difference between men and women, is exactly what would be predicted for a mostly monogamous species.” (Judson pg. 163)

In an attempt to clarify my question, and the reasons for asking it, I present the following.

Through out human history there have been wars, and many times the women were treated as simply spoils of war. Using the Bible a historical social commentary, when the Isrealites attacked a city, if it did not surrender, when it fell “the women, the children, the livestock and everything else in the city, you may take these as plunder for yourselves” (Deut 20:10 – 14). This tradition was continued in medieval Europe, and “the women of a besieged town taken by storm might be raped” (Morrow, pg 378).
The Japanese soldiers raped thousands of Chinese women during the occupation of Nanking during World War Two (Morrow, pg 378)
This happened in the early 1990s in Europe, during the wars following the breakup of Yugoslavia. “Moslem and Croat women from many parts of Bosnia were herded into schools and warehouses and raped repeatedly….kept in these camps for several weeks….Those able to bear children were almost all impregnated” (Glenny, pg 209). It is currently happening in Dafur (the Economist, 13 Oct 2005, 9 Feb 06).
Anthropologist Napoleon Changnon, who was one of the first to study the Yąnomamö people of the Amazon noted that they “regard fights over women as the primary causes of their wars…Although few raids are initiated solely with the intention of capturing women, this is always a desired side benefit” (Changon pg 123).

The above examples show that through out history, especially during the case of a fight between two groups of men, the winners get to keep the females. Which shows why I used the analogy of the bull elk and his harem. Although, the above examples show that a group of men can capture a group of women, possibly for procreation. When captured during a fight between two groups of men, which happens more than we like to admit, we can assume that women do not have the option of choosing the less hairy rapist.

Is it humans that are the only species that fights for females? Doubtful, because for “males in many species, females are the limiting resource for reproductive success” (Wilson, pg 377). Bands of chimpanzees have been shown to attack other groups of chimpanzees and the “results indicate that males are largely successful in defending their females from outside males” (Wilson, pg 377).

But are there times, perhaps when there is peace and plenty and the female has a choice between suitors? Certainly, it is one of the hallmarks of civilization. But I am more concerned with our evolutionary history, and that will have to deal with time before civilization. Perhaps there were no wars, because there were not enough people to form tribes.

Once again to the Bible there is the story of Ruth, who actually chose who she wanted to marry. The Bible does not mention if he was hairy, only that he was a land owner.

It is true that men and women “discriminate on the desirability of potential mates, partly on the basis of physical qualities” (Gangestad, pg 531). But evolutionary psychologist Geoffrey Miller says “Looks are important, but only for the first five minutes’. …Miller’s studies suggest that a man’s sense of humor, and his musical or artistic ability – traits that typically do not bring material advantages – seem to be valued by women as indicators of high intelligence and creativity.” (Anderson, pg 33).

A better indicator for mate preference than looks might be smell. In the classic smelly t-shirt experiment, men and women wore t-shirt to bed, and the next day people were asked to pick the t-shirt that smelled the best (Anderson pg 32). Consistently people “prefer the smells of those whose genes at [the MHC] complex are different from their own” (Judson, pg 52). The major histo-compatibility complex (MHC) is “most variable region of the human genome and plays an important role in immune function” (Anderson, pg 32). This area seems to give each person a unique odor, and “spontaneous abortions are more likely when couples match at particular MHC genes” (Judson, pg 52).

So why is there a lack of hair on humans compared to other primates?
“A recently mooted hypothesis that human hairlessness evolved late in human evolution as a result of the adoption of clothing and the need to reduce the load of external parasites finds no support in light of the overwhelming evidence of the importance of hairlessness in thermal sweating and whole-body cooling in maintaining stable core temperature and homeostasis.” (Jablonski, pg 599).

(The Plague showed that external parasites could prove harmful to clothed modern humans.)
Of the primates, humans have the highest ratio of eccrine sweat glands to apocrine sweat glands (Hanna, pg 272). The eccrine sweat glands are used for thermoregulation, secreting mostly water (Martini, pg 168). The apocrine sweat glands produce an oily, potentially odorous, secretion (Martini, pg 167). Maintaining a homeostatic body temperature is important for creatures that depend so much upon their brains. Less body hair helps thermal regulation in a hot environment “because it increases thermal conductance and permits additional heat loss through sweating” (Jablonski, pg 598-599). Studies have shown that “humans …the highest capacity for heat loss through evaporation of perspiration exceeding that of monkeys [macaques and baboons] by a significant amount…. on the basis of the anatomical distribution of eccrine glands, these primates [great apes] also seem inferior to humans in sweat capacity” (Hanna, pg 260.)

I do openly admit that many times it is the female that chooses the male, especially in our current society. But when society is lacking, since on average “it is undisputed that men have greater physical strength than women” (Quinn pg186), there are many cases when females do not have the option of picking the less hairy man. The better explanation is that humans are less hair so they can sweat to beat the heat.
________________________

But GBatT,

How come other apes and chimpanzees, which evolved in equally hot, humid environments have also not become somewhat hairless? Why haven't ALL species in hot humid environments evolved hairlessness?????

Furthermore, you are not going back far enough in time to surmize a hypothesis. The examples you quote for human male bravado over female 'weakness' were from historical dates of maybe 2-3,000 years ago. Humans evolved from chimps and apes over 5 million years ago!!!! None of your references adequately address this discrepancy. Finally, I hate to be a stickler, but none of your references are experts in evolutionary biology...I am not swayed.

-Professor

Sources

1. Anderson, Nick “The Reduction of Seduction” the Scientist Sept 2006, pg 28-33

2. Judson, Olivia Dr. Tatian’s Sex Advice to All Creation, 2002, Metropolitan Books, New York

3. Morrow, Lance “Rape” The Reader’s Companion to Military History Robert Crowley & Geoffrey Parker editors, 1996, Houghton Mifflin Company, New York

4. Glenny, Misha The Fall of Yugoslavia: the Third Balkan War, 1993, Penguin Books, New York

5. Chagnon, Napoleon A. Yąnomamö the Fierce People, 1968 Holt, Rinehart & Winston, New York

6. The Bible, New International Version,

7. The Economist “Darfur’s Despair” Oct 13, 2005 print edition

8. The Economist “Bring on the Blue Helmets” Feb 9, 2006 print ed

9. Quinn, N. “Anthropological Studies on Women’s Status” Annual Review of Anthropology 1977, 6:181-225

10. Wilson, ML, Wrangham, RW “Intergroup relations in chimapanzees” Annual Review of Anthropology Oct 2003, 32: 363-392

11. Jablonski, Nina G. “The Evolution of Human Skin and Skin Color” Annual Review of Anthropology Oct 2004, 33:585-623

12. Gangestad, SW & Scheyd, GJ “The Evolution of Human Physical Attractiveness” Annual Review of Anthropology, 2005, 34:523-548

13. Hanna JM, Brown DE “Human Heat Tolerance: An Anthropological Perspective” Annual Review of Anthropology 1983, 12:259-284

14. Martini, Frederic Fundamentals of Anatomy & Physiology, 7th edition, 2006, Pearson Benjamin Cummings, San Francisco

Thank God for IVF

Thank God for IVF

Hey Sportsfans!!!
I’m sure you all know the latest stats, numbers, & results and have acted accordingly on your Fantasy Fertility League.

But in case you don’t read my inspiration's blogs…and ya should…Lemme give ya a play by play of recent developments since we last spoke.

We needed a beta result of 50 on Tuesday.
And my woman stepped up to the proverbial plate and gave 110%. Knocked that beta test right out of the park. Result 476!

But a game ain’t won by one scrimmage. The next stop was Friday, they keep trying to stop us with the Beta Test Defense. But my woman crashed through the line of blood-drawing scrimmage, shaked off some “don’t wanna give blood” tacklers, and sprinted to the end-zone. We needed to double Tuesday’s results, that means a Beta of 952. She had a 1898.

Just for kicks, Saturdays are for sports. So, to beat this poor metaphor the way Joe Louis beat down Max Schmeling…

My wife approached the batting crease, she was going to be the opener, facing the most hostile bowling from a fresh bowler with a new ball. She hit the ball hard and ran to the opposite end of the pitch, while I ran to my end. We were running between the wickets! We both touched the ground behind the popping crease! Don Bradman would have been proud!

Or in a language we all can understand….

GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Yes, she's pregnant.

And now for the post competition statistical breakdown from our friends at IndecisiveRamblings:

So, I've been playing with the numbers a bit. At first assuming linear response changes, I calculated the time it doubled at 24 hours and then I realized linearity was a bad assumption since it's supposed to continue to double over the same fixed time period.

So, with an exponential assumption, I calculated the doubling time at approximately 36 hours. That's pretty fast....

0 hrs- 476
36 hrs- 952
72 hrs- 1904
98 hrs- 3808
134 hrs- 7616
170 hrs- 15232

Leave it to me to break your pregnancy down into math. Hey, GBatT would appreciate it. :-)

how to make a baby, the geeky way

Hey Sportsfans!

I don’t know how to write this entry. I’ve been meaning to write this for a long time. It’s 5 in the morning, and I guess in the spirit of NaNoWriMo I should just put pen to paper, so to speak.

I think it’s kinda heroic to speak the unspoken. If I recall correctly, there was a First Lady who had breast cancer, and actually talked about it when cancer was unspoken. So, I’m gonna try and be brave like a 1st Lady.

For this post, I will define “geek” as “using sophisticated and expensive technology to accomplish what should be a simple task.”

What follows is my how to make a baby post. It’s plenty of TMI, so if ya don’t want to read it, you don’t have to. I wouldn’t. I don’t like livin’ it.

One day, after a run with SnarkyKat, I overheard a young woman talking about her and her husband’s life plans. They just got married, they wanted children but were going to wait until after they were financially stable, which would be a few years after they were done with the grad school they had just started. It sounded so very familiar. I wanted to scream warning to them. But I didn’t, because seriously, who would want to listen to a sweaty screaming crazy old man. But here’s the thing, I wish I had known when I was younger how difficult it can be to make a baby.

Infertility is more common than I used to know.
“Infertility is defined as a couple's inability to become pregnant after 1 year of sex without birth control. From 10% to 15% of couples attempting to have a child have infertility problems.”

Is it going up? I doubt it. There is some scholarly book that says infertility levels have been about the same in America for the history of America. Sorry, I don’t know what book, and right now, I need to type and not get caught in details. (Maybe my better half knows the name of the book.)

Hmm…here’s a good post that is better organized and more articulate than me

Here’s a list of blogs of people going through infertility, I gotta say, some of the titles are funny. But it’s more of a laugh, or go crazy

I don’t really want to talk about it because…
…I don’t have much to say.
…because it sucks, and what can you do.
…because it could be a lot worse. (I could be living in Iraq.)
…because I have already been blessed. Who am I to complain?
…because if people don’t know, then they can’t say the wrong thing.

How many people know about our struggle with infertility? Our friends, all of her family, my immediate family. I think at my work only one friend knows. But they’re pretty smart there, maybe more of them know.

But, gonna try and be brave like a 1st Lady.

Sometimes people, when they first find out say stupid things. My wife is a lot more open about our infertility, so I have witnessed her having to deal with it. We know that these people aren’t trying to be mean, they just don’t know any better. It’s still kinda a taboo topic, it seems to me. But, getting the word out, maybe some people can be educated.

Someone asked, “whose fault is it?” meaning are we dealing with male factor or female factor infertility. First, “fault” is totally the wrong word, because that implies we did something wrong. I really got upset when I heard this, I should have explained, but instead I just faded out of the room. (Wha?? He just walked away! My friends will say in mock surprise.) We didn’t do anything wrong. It’s kinda like being hit by a comet. Not something we expected, and then bam! We have a problem. And, as I have learned through the torture of the treatments, basically the geeky way to make a baby is the same if it is male or female infertility factor. Oh, and for reference, both are equally common.
(That was one thing I liked about “Friends” is both Monica & Chandler had infertility issues.)

Who am I to complain? I am no one special, and from a historical perspective, I live better than most kings have. I have a wonderful wife. I have great family & friends. I live in a great country. It’s just that we have “A natural ambition, To see a reflection of me and you”

Common things people say, “Relax”, “think positive,” “just have more sex”…and sure, those are nice platitudes, but not really that helpful. And when you’ve heard them lots of times, from well meaning people, it starts to grate on your nerves. (Since I’m the quiet one, I hear them a lot less than my wife does. Yeah, that’s basically the lesson I’ve learned, don’t talk about it unless ya wanna get grumpy. But…gotta be brave like a 1st Lady.) Alrighty, let’s say someone has bad vision, how would “relax”, “think positive” and “just use your eyes more” really help the person? I’m all about the power of prayer, and the power of positive thinking, and optimism, and relaxing, …but if you have a medical condition…cancer, broke leg, depression, infertility, smallpox…maybe the best thing to do is to seek medical help.

To all the sports fans out there…what to say if someone you love gets hit with the Comet of Infertility. “I’m sorry…that sucks…if you need a shoulder to cry on I’ll be there…” and pro’lly you should remind them of the “if you need a shoulder” part from time to time, because trust me, they’ll be doing plenty of crying, and they’ll be feeling plenty alone.

If your enemies get cursed with infertility, then you can say these things:
Just evolution getting rid of the bad genes.
Aren’t you being selfish for wanting your own baby?
It’s God’s punishment, or why are you playing God?

And if my enemies (yeah, I gots a few) said such things to me, hopefully I could be articulate and reply with:
I don’t think God punishes people with medical conditions. Sickle Cell Anemia is not a punishment. For a punishment to be effective, it needs to happen right away and fit the crime. For example, lets say that a 6 year old child scribbles on the walls of the apartment, with a screwdriver. (Hey, the Egyptians chiseled art on the walls, why can’t I?) It would not be a good teaching tool to punish that crime by not letting him use the car ten years later. That why we at GBAtT don’t believe AIDS is a punishment from God, the punishment can be years removed from the action that caused it. Now, fire hurts, that is a good effective learning thing. But I don’t think God punishes us with pain for the sin of touching fire. I digress. Are we selfish for not “just adopting”, uh…isn’t everyone? Evolution…I say, we are humans, we are tool users, and once we started using fire, we as a species’ gene-pool got physically “weaker”.

My feelings? Well, feelings aren’t important; they get in the way of what’s important. That’s my standard line, and for example I will say, how many people feel like going to work, or feel like taking out the trash, or feel like running that extra lap, or feel like changing a diaper at 3AM? (Actually, my wife & I joke, that if we finally do become pregnant, then we will be smiling and singing and dancing during all the bad stuff….like…woo-hoo, we have to change diapers, THAT MEANS WE HAVE A BABY!!!)

Feelings…I feel inadequate. I feel like a failure as a husband. We have a problem, and there’s not much I can do. And doing is important for men to work for a solution. Talk is cheap, it’s what politicians do. (Don’t forget to vote today.)

Ah…it’s 6AM. Time to go help make a baby. (1280 words in an hour!)

Currently we are going through In Vitro Fertilization. Which means that at 6am everyday, I get to shoot drugs into my wife’s butt. (Insert jokes. We have. Hey, ya gotta take the laughs when you can.)

My role…be supportive. I have insisted on being there for her shots, even when it was inconvenient for us, because I foolishly am taking 2 night classes. I just wanted to be there. Currently, I do the 6AM shots. (We get to sleep in until 7am on the weekends!)

My contribution…doesn’t seem very significant. From the medical necessity role, my wife has to take all the drugs, get the most invasive tests, get the blood work (and can not give blood), …it’s almost like it’s all about her. (Remember, for male and/or female infertility factor, most of the procedures are the same.) Me, what did I have to do? Well, make a sperm contribution in a cup. (Dear Infertility Specialists…Playboy is not that exciting of a magazine. Especially if you’re flipping the pages, trying to get in the mood, and then you see an angry Terrell Owens. Not helpful.)

In fact the whole led to an exam room by a grandmotherly sort, who points out where the magazines are, hands you a plastic cup and says, “tell us if you spill any” is not really mood enhancing. Or fun. But, a man’s gotta do, what a man’s gotta do. And who am I to complain, it’s not like any of her tests are funner.

If you want the future mother of my children’s perspective of all of this craziness

Well, I gotta go to work. Not that I feel like it. (Time lag explanation, I will have my favorite editor/best-friend/inspiration/wife read this before I post it.)

So today we find the results to the IVF. Are we pregnant? Ready to be extremely emotional?